Overprotecting Parents – Not Ethical?

I went to a workshop on “Code of Ethics” by a couple (for a lack of a better word) New York State snobs from the National Alliance of Direct Support Professionals. There were few things I agree with, many I just found not appropriate for the rank and file. Some staff (even run ins as late as the last month) do act pretty “bossy” and come off as hostile and aggressive.

I do not like a hands-off approach allowing an adult client to do whatever they want, because they have to assimilate to the “real world”. While DSPs (known as “caretakers”, etc.) do have duties to say stop someone from harming themselves to others, the problem is that if we put high standards to the bottom, what happens to the top portion?

I come from organizations (educational collaboratives, school districts, area agencies and day programs) where there is no ethical standards. The lack of ethics were not happening in small 2 people towns, no this was in the largest communities North of Boston and the downstate side of NH. They had no moral duty to protect taxpayers from Waste, Fraud and Abuse from department heads wanting to spend some money but couldn’t explain why because of “confidentiality reasons”. The largest Area Agency in this state for autistics and alike runs a lot like a corporate charity but also runs it like it’s an Enron or a Goldman Sachs, but yet despite the reputation in the inside circles, nothing has been done. The area agency is being the area agency.

Above is a primer to the ongoing discussion of “ethics”, but now I want to turn the focus to overprotecting parents. The ones who will manipulate children to their grave. The ones who will let their kids be “safe” and protect their psyche over their literal safety. How come there is no parenting standards for special needs? Why are parents exempt from ethical standards? How come the “professionals” (like psychologists) will drool over their parent’s inability to let them be free, and just admire them for their parenting when the child was very young. The kid grows up, and the “professionals” continue to drool over years old decent parenting. They don’t care to understand that the child is grown up, and they are so arrogant to understand the mother or father is overprotecting their kids and they think its OK.

Well its not!

If you have more than one kid, its better than having a single child. You have no rights to protect them so much to make them an icicle! All you’re doing is making the kid not wanting to do anything that they think may be too risky then you get upset at the kid of why your kid won’t grow or be challenged.

This is where the professional should be showing the parents the mirror and have their autistic-like tendencies be put into the child’s “3 year eval” since parents have no capability to ruining a kids brain.

Unless the NADSP or some other organization turns the tables of “ethics” away from caretakers and more towards the real threat, the parents, and the corrupt white collared hacks at the local school districts.